Look Past All the Artisanal Cheese: French Potato Chips Are Utterly Decadent.
Over the holidays, I found myself in France, a place that seemed on its best behaviour. Discreet, sparkling decorations, outdoor market stands overflowing with beautifully vibrant fruits and veggies, and enough cheeses capable of clogging the whole Eurotunnel with arterial plaque. Piled platters of shimmering crustaceans resting on ice visible behind steamy café panes. While observing a long but orderly line of stylish locals collecting their craft Christmas cakes, I mused, with some guilt, that my place of origin, York, which turns into a contemporary interpretation of a scene of decadence during the festive season featuring e-cigarettes tasting of mincemeat and ready-to-drink concoctions, could learn a few lessons.
A Refined Veneer
Yet every bit of “art de vivre” stuff proves to be a refined front – The nation succumbs just as easily to its basest appetites like any other place. Just go into a local *supermarché* and the truth is revealed. The snack food corridor is an absolute sink of depravity, lined with flavours including blue cheese, chickpea fritter, Flemish stew and savory dairy fat profiles. What kind of person consumes chips that taste of butter? It brings to mind something from the notorious US state fairs where they fry solid butter in batter. A certain comedian stated online they’re the best crisps she has ever sampled, but she’s obviously succumbed to a form of Breton brainwashing – after all, her childhood was in Brittany.
International Unregulation
One must acknowledge the crisp flavouring industry worldwide is just as anarchic as major tech firms. Nobody seems willing to let potato be potato, enhanced only as necessary with just a dignified dusting of salt. Our own nation possesses a dark history regarding chip varieties on British soil, particularly during the festive period. Not long ago, it should be remembered, gave us Christmas-cake flavoured crisps and exclusive steak-and-pâté flavoured chips. Let us also recall that time a famous high-street chain deemed “sparkling wine and seasonal fruit” made for a good idea in a salty crisp? I expected more from the home of haute cuisine.
Where does it end? Foie gras crisps? Cream puff crisps? Cigarette-tasting crisps? It's best I halt, before I accidentally suggest the next big thing.
